After getting engaged, one of the first decisions a bride makes is selecting her maid (or matron) of honor. The maid of honor is usually the friend/sister who is closest to the bride and will be the bride’s confidante throughout the planning process. It is a privilege and an honor to be asked to assist the bride during this very important time in her life.
If you have never been in a wedding party or have never been involved in planning a wedding, you may not know what your responsibilities as maid of honor are. Most times, those responsibilities depend on what the bride needs. Customary responsibilities include accompanying the bride as she selects her vendors, helping her plan the wedding, providing emotional support and listening when the bride needs to vent. The most important thing is to let the bride know that you will be there for her throughout the process and you will assist her whenever you can.
While there in no definitive list of the duties and responsibilities of the maid of honor that applies to every wedding, here are some guidelines:
- Assist the bride with the selection of the bridesmaids’ attire and coordinate with the bridesmaids as far as ordering the gown, fittings, shoes, make-up, etc.
- Host the bridal shower in honor of the bride (usually with the help of the bridesmaids) unless the bride’s mother (family) is planning to host the shower. The cost of the shower is usually divided amongst the bridesmaids so be sure to include them in the planning.
- Plan and host the bachelorette party with the bridesmaids.
- Assist the bride in selecting her wedding day attire. Again, if the bride is planning on going shopping with her mother, you should still offer to accompany her.
- Assist the bride on the day of the wedding as she is getting ready.
- Depending on the gown, you may have to adjust the bride’s train throughout the ceremony.
- During the ceremony, it is customary to hold the bride’s bouquet.
- Sign any required paperwork witnessing the ceremony and sign the marriage license if asked by the officiant.
- If asked, give a toast to the couple at the wedding reception. While traditionally the best man gave the toast, now both the best man and the maid of honor toast the couple.
- During the reception, help the bride with any details that come up.
Now you’re ready to get started being a wonderful maid of honor.